


The Spoony Experiment

by PastaBucket



Category: The Spoony Experiment
Genre: Action Comedy, Gen, Manic Episode, cartoon violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-26
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-08-07 23:17:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16417922
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PastaBucket/pseuds/PastaBucket
Summary: You know, I'm tired of Spoony just sitting in his goddamn basement doing nothing of worthwhile, and so I'm hijacking his show, and doing something with it. I miss the old manic-crazy Spoony, and so I'm retconning everything into one big looney tunes power fantasy. Basically I'm kicking realism to the curb and just going with pure entertainment value.





	1. Chapter 1

"Enough! I've had it!" The closed door to his inner sactum didn't do much to muffle the scream, but it was soon kicked open by the raving lunatic himself.

"April! Wear this! We're going to war!"

"A... ...cat suit? You know Halloween isn't until next week, right?"

"You will be the Catwoman to my Batman! It was either that or Alfred, and I ain't having my woman being a butler!"

"'Your' woman?"

"Y-you know what I mean!", Spoony screamed. "The one who lives in my house and who has seen me naked a few times!"

"Yeah, whatever. I try to push those images out of my mind, but you keep reminding me.", April shuddered. "This is why I can't eat gummy worms anymore. Yeehh..."

"To the Batmobile!", Spoony screamed once he had put on his orange dish gloves.

"What batmobile?"

"The bus! I mean the bus!"

"Fine. Where are we going?"

"To Washington! It's time to beat that rambling orange lunatic once and for all, in the name of humanity and all of decency!"

"Oh, so those were Twitter screams I heard. I'm assuming that you haven't thought this through."

"Not one bit! There is no time for plans. This is the time for action! It's an experiment I'd like to call ..."

"...'The Spoony Experiment'?", April guessed.

"Wha-? How did you know?", Spoony gawked.

"Just a hunch.", April shrugged.

"Yes! This is the time for The Spoony Experiment!" ...and with those words Spoony opened the front door and stepped out into the sunlight outside. "Augh! My eyes!" He covered his face with his arm. "Sun - arch nemesis - we meet again! I thought I banished you to the Black Hole!"

"Well, it's been a while since you've been outside...", April casually remarked.

"I'll... I'll endure! This is for America!"

 

Trump jumped in his seat as the main doors to his oval office were kicked open.

"Orange Face Man!", Spoony screamed. "We meet at last! Your time has come!"

"Security!", Trump shouted.

"Hah!", Spoony cackled. "They're all taken care of. It was a lot of hard work shoving their mobiles phones and other things up their own asses, but it was well worth it!"

Trump opened his mouth to protest, but Spoony had already heard enough from him, and soon Trump's ass was stuffed full of his mobile phone, the normal phone, and then the flagpole. Spoony had taken the flag off before that, and was now wearing it as a cape. Putting a foot on the back of the orange man that had pretended to be a president, he chanted "USA! USA!".


	2. Chapter 2

"...and after defeating the former president and banishing him from the White House, the vigilante instated a NEW president, that appears to be a blue robot." A picture in picture live feed was shown next to the reporter, of Burton just sitting there behind the desk of the Oval Office, doing nothing. "The republicants are already backing him, saying that he's doing a smashing job as their new candidate."

Burton: "..."

 

Spoony fiddled with the lock of the barred cell doors of the medieval Mexican camp, before he could swing them open. "Run free, creepy children! Run free!"

April just stood by and watched it happen in her leather outfit. "Where will they go? Shouldn't you take them to their mothers or something?"

"You lack faith, April! Let nature take its course! This is America - land of the free and home of the brave!"

"Fine - whatever... I'm more worried about you putting Burton in charge of running the country."

"No, he was a brilliant choice, and here's why: Burton doesn't think!"

"Yes?"

"Don't you get it?! They're always listening, April!" He began to wildly gesticulate in midair, lost in his own visions. "The Chinese! The Russians! North Korea! The window licking Creepers! They'll trace your phone in a heartbeat! They'll hack your computers even if it's airgapped in bunkers miles beneath Earth's crust! They'll read your screen emissions! Think about it! Any choice that we make, can ultimately be predicted! Nothing is truly random! Even our brains can't make truly random choices, because we're bound by the rules of psychology and biochemistry just as much as any AI is!" He turned to April. "...but Burton, Burton is special. They called me crazy when I built Burton - said he wouldn't amount to anything, and just look at him now! Unhackable! Unpredictable! Unmentionable!"

"Unmentionable?"

"Don't mark words!"

"Sorry, 'boss'. So now what?"

"Now... ...we find Richard Spencer, and punch him in the face! My asshole list is long and unforgiving!"


End file.
